i moved into my own apartment and it's been hard to be back on my own. everything is going to be ok. i'm not worried about that, it still isn't an easy process to go through when you care so much about that person. i just knew i didn't love him like that anymore and needed to be done with it because it wasn't fair to either of us for me to keep trying at something i knew wasn't there.
i'll always love him, just not in the same way i did. he came into my life when i needed him and taught me a lot about myself and love. i was reading back through my posts and i know i loved him. i know i appreciated him. i know i was with him for a reason. i can't stress enough that everything happens for a reason. even if we don't understand why we have to go through it.
it's going to be a rough few weeks getting used to being back on my own and not seeing cute guy every day but i can't stress enough that i made the right decision. i need some me time to figure out what it is that i'm missing from my life that made me so happy before. i know i'll find it, even if it might take me a while.
i printed off my favorite quote and put it next to my desk so that i can always remember it.
"may i see the things in front of me as they are, not as i think them to be.
may i walk the steps ahead of me one at a time, not wondering if there's a map.
may i say the things that fix things, not break them further apart.
may i do what i need to do, not be distracted by what i can't.
may i dream of what i hope for, not of what i fear.
may i love you like i love you, not as any other."
- i wrote this for you
it's something that i am trying to live my life by and i would say that is a pretty good way to live your life. everything is going to be ok. i have to believe that.